a few jokes

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a few jokes

Postby untraceable » Fri Apr 30, 2010 7:31 pm

Gordon Brown goes on a state visit to Israel. While he is on a tour of Jerusalem he suffers a heart attack and passes away. The undertaker tells the British Diplomats accompanying him, 'You can have him shipped home for £5,000,000, or you can bury him here, in the Holy Land , for just £100.'

The British Diplomats go into a corner and discuss for a minute. They come back to the undertaker and tell him they want Gordon shipped home.

The undertaker is puzzled and asks, 'Why would you spend £5, 000,000 to ship him home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only £100? With the money you save you could help pay back some of the deficit, help pay for the Olympic Games or help the elderly'.

The British Diplomats replied, 'Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. We just can't take the risk.'




Think about this:
1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments

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COWS

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that
during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a
single cow, born in Bourne almost three years ago, right
to the stall where she slept in the county of Lincolnshire ?
And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls.

But they are unable to locate 25,000 illegal immigrants

wandering around our country.
Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

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THE BRITISH CONSTITUTION

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq ...
Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a
lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years,
And we're not using it anymore.

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THE 10 COMMANDMENTS


The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments
Posted in a courthouse or Parliament, is this --you cannot post
'Thou Shalt Not Steal', 'Thou Shalt Not Commit
Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of
Lawyers, judges and politicians ..... It creates a
hostile work environment.

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